We almost got kicked out of Lamaze.

That's right. We almost got kicked out of Lamaze.

We had our first class last night from 6:30-9:30....which is a really long time.
The whole class is really kind of dorky...and we had to wear these dorky name tags...and the teacher calls on people to answer her questions. hello--clue--we're all first time parents here! None of us knew what effacement was, or when specifically to go to the hospital...etc.

So, she calls on me for the question: You're at teh grocery store when your water breaks, what's one thing you might like to have with you?

My answer: a mop?

Teacher: "Well, in that situation, you might not really want to be mopping...so what's something else?"

Me: "My husband--so he can mop. I dont want to leave a mess in Tom Thumb."

Teacher: "Maybe something like a towel."

Me: "You want me to start carrying around a towel just in case my water breaks? That's dorky."

Damon raised his hand & said he had some questions about the water breaking....
Damon: "How much are we talking here? ...a couple of teaspoons, a cup-full, or buckets? I mean, can she ride in the cab of my truck or does she need to ride in the bed?"

So, naturally at this point, we're all laughing...except the teacher. I know Damon's not serious!

Teacher: "You'd never want to transport a laboring pregnant woman in the back of a truck".

LADY, LIGHTEN UP!!!!

So later in the class--she has us all sucking on a Lifesaver candy. The teacher then makes the analogy of the Lifesaver melting like dilation & effacement. Damon spit that candy out so fast. He practically wiped off his tongue & let us all know that he did NOT want any of that going on in his mouth.

Toward the end of the class....the teacher had us get down on our mats w/ pillows & we were going to work on relaxation & breathing.... she turned on some relaxation CD, and turned off the lights. Mind you--there are 12 couples in this class. We're all laying on the floor. Damon said he was practically spooning w/ the girl behind him. So, we're laying there...packed in like Sardines...and as soon as the lights were out, Damon whispered, "Wanna Make Out?" I started giggling...and could not stop! I was laughing into my pillow, but it was apparent that I was laughing.... My thought about his comment: "That's what got us into this situation!!!"... So anyway...I'm laughing, Damon's laughing...the couples around us start laughing... Well, the teacher didnt like that...And she went on & on about how we should take this seriously...blah blah blah blah....

So, we calm down...Damon starts rubbing my face & head...and playing with my hair...and the teacher was saying something... I dunno---she just kept talking. The next thing I know--Damon woke me up b/c he said I was snoring. Sorry! I was freaking tired. It was after 9, and he was rubbing my head. All of those factors coming together--too much to resist. I was out.

Then, the class was over.

We have to go for 4 weeks...3 hours per class.
So, we'll keep going...and hopefully not get thrown out!

Today's vitals:
BP: 115/69
P: 105