Life Is Just So Daily

Sunday, January 30, 2005

Update for Sunday.

How am I feeling? Well, I think I am getting over this sickness. I wake up coughing & it keeps me from falling asleep, but I just take a Benadryl to help with the sleeplessness.
Pregnancy-wise...well, I think I started the whole morning sickness yesterday...except, mine is kind of an all-day-nausea thing without vomitting. Up until yesterday I was eating everything in sight. Everything sounded good to me. I've only thrown up once so far, and Damon says that it has nothing to do with hormones/morning sickness. He says that it is because I sat & ate an entire supreme pizza by myself. ....his theory could be entirely true! Anyway, starting yesterday, I just woke up feeling gross. I get hungry, but then NOTHING sounds good. I will finally make up my mind about wanting something to eat, and by the time I finish eating it, I dont even want to look at it, think about it, smell it, etc.
So far today, I've had a bowl of cereal, an orange, and a plate of soy nuggets with ketchup. I'm supposed to be increasing my protein (the letter from the dr says), but I'm not really wanting to eat much meat.

I go to the dr on 2/10 for our first sonogram & my two hour dr's appt.
Apparently I'll meet with my dr, the "OB Coordinator", and get my sonogram. Cant wait. Damon of course will be in attendance. Sooooo excited!!!

I have so much that needs to be done around this house, but I am just feeling too lazy to do it.

I cant believe I have to go back to work tomorrow. What on earth am I going to wear???

My head: well, I've still got the original spot (which is getting bigger according to Damon). The night that I got home from Hawaii, Damon found another spot. Smaller, about the size of a quarter. Then, yesterday morning, I found yet another spot. Even smaller, about the size of a dime. Still using the meds. Convinced I'll be bald by the time this baby gets here! (So what...I'll be mom!)

Friday, January 28, 2005

I'm sick & I dont feel well....

Okay, so I have some virus that gives me all this respiratory gunk.
I feel like crap.
Because my baby's organs are forming, I can only take OTC meds for the symptoms. Which, you know--would probably be the same even if I werent pregnant because what I have is a virus--anyway. That's not the point. The point is: I feel like crap and I am whining about it!

I've been off work Wed, Thurs, now today. I'll be off Sat & Sun only to return to work on Monday.

So, I'm using three days of my super-valuable PTO, and I feel like crap. Cant even be productive with this time. I would have much rather preferred to spend these days cleaning, reorganizing, redecorating the house. But no--I get to be sick instead. Ugh.

Movie Reviews:
"The Terminal"...I didnt think it was all that. Would definitely not watch it again.
"Super Man 2"...everyone said it was better than the first. Well, I wouldnt know because I could not get through the first 30 minutes. I found it to be boring.
"The Virgin Suicides"...it was okay. Super bizarre...
"Collateral"...with Tom Cruise...loved it, loved it!
"Open Water"....horrible. would not sit through it again.
"Little Black Book"...different than I expected. I think I built it up too much in my head, so it was somewhat disappointing. A little cute, but I wouldnt rent it again..may watch it again if it came on t.v.

I know that's kind of a lot of movie reviews...but I'm sick & stuck at home.

Monday, January 24, 2005

I'm soooooosoooooo sick!

Okay, so I have a cold, I think.
I'm all nasally (if that's a word), I've got a sore throat, sneezing. Sounds like a typical cold. I cant take hardly anything for it (b/c I'm now pregnant). So--symptom control is minimal.

I feel like crap. I have no idea why I came to work today. I have no business being here.

But, we're all going to be in a day-long meeting this week. Three workers go tomorrow, three Wednesday (incl.me) and 3 on Thursday. So--that means that Tues, Wed, & Thursday are going to be awful & crazy.

I absolutely cannot miss Wednesday, and it would be selfish & inconvenient for others if I miss tomorrow. But, I feel like crap. We'll just have to see how I feel in the morning.
I cant control being sick or I would have just chosen not to be...you know?

Okay...I'm out for today. I'm tired. I am hungry. I cant breathe out of my nose.

Thursday, January 20, 2005

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!

I'M PREGNANT!!!!!

I got a BFP (Big Fat Positive) yesterday afternoon! I was at work when I tested, and it was positive!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I'm going to be a mom. Damon's going to be a dad. We're going to be parents!!!

Okay--so I was 11 days late. Tested at seven days late & got a negative. Tested again yesterday, got a positive!
I was at work, so obviously the cat got out of the bag here because I was screaming, "Oh my gosh! I'm pregnant!" I called my friend, Erin, who brought me a white long sleeved t-shirt with the word "pregnant" across the chest. I wore it home to surprise Damon. He way laying on the couch when I walked in. He looked at my shirt...
"Does that say 'pregnant'?"
"Yes"
"Are you pregnant?"
"Yes"
"Are you really?"
"Yes"
"Seriously?"
"Yes!"....this little scenario went on for a while...It took him a second to absorb the information, you know??? It was soooooo cute!

So...we're pregnant. And, if the "pregnancy wheel" is correct...it predicts how far along you are & your estimated due date, based on the first day of your last period. So--if the wheel is right, I am 5 weeks & 6 days, and due Sept.16th. The bad news: that means I will be big, huge, pregnant, in the Texas Summer time! Yuck!!!!

I go for my first OB appt. on 2/10. It's apparently a 2 hour appointment. You meet with the doctor, meet with the hospital's "OB Coordinator" & get an ultrasound to measure your baby. Woohoo!!! So....I will be 8 weeks, 6 days then. I just read earlier that at 8 weeks, your baby begins to hear. That's so wild!

What else???

A lot has happened since I last blogged. Here's an update...
Went to Corsicana for the awards ceremony. It was great, and I think important that we were all there.

The cat came back. He got into a fight while he was out there. He lost a claw (we're still doctoring that foot), had cuts & scrapes on him...they are mostly healed now.

Went to the deposition. It sucked. Mom's attorney told me that I did well, but I hated it so much, that I dont even want to type about it.

Went to Hawaii & San Francisco with my dad! It was aaaawwwweeesommmeee! In fact, it sucks to be back here at work right now! We went to Honolulu/Waikiki area. Ate a lot, laid out in the sun a lot, shopped a lot...had a great time! then, coming back--I had a 6 hour layover in San Francisco. Dad took me down to Fisherman's Wharf & I got to eat hot shrimp with melted butter for breakfast!! It was faaaannnntasssstic!

I still cant believe I'm pregnant.

I had a dream last night, and in it, I was walking about 5 or 6 feet behind Damon who was holding hands with our "son" who was about 5 or 6 years old. He had sports equipment/pads with him for a football or hockey game. It was sooo cute. So--I never saw his face, I just saw them from behind & knew it was our son. So--this girl at work told me this morning that she constantly dreamed that she was having a boy, and it's a boy. My mom told me this morning that she has a feeling that it's a boy. I have a feeling that it's a boy. We'll all just have to wait & see!!!!

Okay...time to get to work!

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Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Busy, Busy Week!

Okay. It's Tuesday.
I am working today, and then right after work I will be driving to Corsicana. It's about an hour & a half away. Why am I going...well, there are a couple of police officers there who will be getting an award. About 4 years ago...I think it was 4 years ago...my Aunt Jean was killed in a car accident. The police officers who tried to save her, & who successfully saved her dog, are getting an award. They have an often thankless job, and a dangerous one at that! A lot of the family is going to try to be there when they get the award. I think it will be good for them. I can imagine that on one hand they think that they did all they could--but on the other hand they may question that. I just want to go & be a part of the official "Thank you"!

My Aunt Jean... she was so sweet. She was soooo nice. When I think about her, the first thing I think about her is how non-judgemental she was. You could talk about anything with her. She would sit and listen about anything & it was wonderful. She was the "cool" aunt because nothing you could ever say was wrong or seemed to shock her! That being said--we all have our problems..we all have our weaknesses & all have made mistakes. I think that's how she was able to be supportive to people without judging them. Now, these are just reflections on my relationship with Aunt Jean. She was also a daughter, a mother, a sister. I'm sure that those relationships were unique & wonderful in their own ways.

...my mom just called. She said that they are going to show a video at the meeting, and it's from the rescue attempt. I dont know about that... Mom also said that there are 2 different videos from the accident, and my cousin Nicole has seen both. Nicole said that one is very graphic & the other is not. I just dont know if I can handle that. I mean, I've seen tons of traumatic stuff come through the ER. They've never been somebody that I love though. At Aunt Jeans funeral--it was open casket. At the end everyone walks by the casket one last time before they close it. I got close enough to see how bruised her face looked & I just couldnt go any further. I had to turn around & go to the bathroom & just cry. It was awful. I understand the need for closure--and even the need to be sure that the person is actually in the casket, is actually dead (a topic for another paragraph, another post I'm sure...). I just could not stand to see her body like that though. It was just not very much like her.
...which brings me to this: it is amazing how one body can look so different when it is filled with life & when it is not. When my Aunt Nell died, her body in the casket looked very little like she did when she was alive. It wasnt the makeup, it wasnt the hair...she didnt die in any type of traumatic event...it was simply the absence of life...the absence of Nell herself that changed the appearance of her body & face dramatically.

Ugh. Okay...so today is going to be hard. I think it is very important that we go anyway.

Tomorrow morning: I am due in the lawyer's office at 7:30 to start my deposition. I had a mini-deposition with the attorney last night on the phone just to prepare me for the opposition tomorrow. The attorney says that legally they are allowed to question me for up to 6 hours. All of this over a car accident. I am not even suing! But, my mother & Allen are. They were injured in the accident, and here we go. The accident was in 2001. October of 2001 to be exact. I was covered in blood after the accident, but it was all Allen's. We were hit by a car that ran a red light. The lady who was driving is now claiming that (1) She just came from over a hill (2) The sun was in her eyes, and it is as if my car appeared from out of nowhere; she never saw the car & (3) Allen was not in a child safety seat; Allen was not in a seat belt; Allen was in the front passenger seat standing up.
Okay--where do I even begin with that??? If you could not even see my car--how the hell could you see Allen standing up in the front passenger seat? That is just bullshit. I know for a fact, with all of my soul & being---Allen was in the backseat on the passenger side in a seatbelt. How do I know that??? Because it seemed like it took me FOREVER to get his seatbelt off of him to get him out of the car. His head was cut open & I could just see clean white skull. He wasnt crying, he wasnt moving, his eyes were closed. My god, I thought he was dead. I could not get him out of the car fast enough. I finally got him out, cradling him, I remember just screaming for someone to call 911. I laid him in the street & it seemed like people on the street were moving in slow motion to come & help me. He did not appear to be breathing. I tried to get his pulse at his wrist but my hands were shaking too much. I tried to get his pulse at his neck but I couldnt. I reassessed the breathing situation, and Allen still did not appear to be breathing. I got ready to start CPR when strangers reached us. At this point, mom was stuck in the car & could not get out to help. She also could not see what was going on & I could hear her freaking out. As I was getting ready to start CPR, Allen started moaning, his eyes opened & rolled back in his head, it was awful. But---I knew at that point that he was breathing & obviously had a pulse!!! A guy named Jason, who was a stranger to me until that day, took his shirt off & put it over the cut on Allen's head. Pressure to stop the bleeding--but that's when his face & eye starting swelling RAPIDLY & it was the deepest shade of purple... ugh, it was awful. That whole day was awful. Okay...enough about that. The point is--I have to be up early & get to look forward to 6 hours of questions about one awful day in my own personal history. Yuck. ...and, I miss that car. It was fun, full of a ton of memories...it was a convertible...and it was paid for!!! I cried & cried when they took it away. Now, it wasnt perfect---but I still miss it.

So...Wednesday after the whole deposition thing I need to go get my car registration renewed. My tag went out in 12/04, so what better way to spend the day than at the downtown Dallas County Records Building. Sure, they probably mailed me a notice...at my old address! I got nothing forwarded...and I have not updated the address on my license yet either. I guess I should try to squeeze that into Wednesday as well.

Wednesday night-- Knot get together @ Blue Mesa @ 6pm. Gotta go. I am the one who kind of coordinated the event. :) The knot is www.theknot.com where I chat frequently. I started with wedding planning, but they have message boards for newlyweds that are fun. So, all of us local "knotties" have get togethers occasionally to see each other, catch up, etc. Should be fun. You also meet new people that live near you...it's fun.

Thursday & Friday--work. I need to take my sister's Christmas gifts over. I may do that Wednesday on my way home from work & before the knottie GTG (get together). I may put it off until Thursday. We'll see....

I'm a bit miffed at Damon right now. He let the cat, Dixon, out yesterday. Dixon is an inside cat. And furthermore, Dixon is my baby! He's beautiful...white & gray with the biggest blue eyes. He tolerates Damon, but he adores me. And, at times I tolerate Damon & adore Dixon! (this is one of those times!!!) See, Damon does not always pay attention when he takes Eddie (the dog) out. He will leave the door open & just assume that the cat cant open the back screen door. Well, he has seen the cat push the screen door open & go out. So, he knows that Dixon can do it. Well, yesterday morning, apparently Damon took Eddie out & Dixon snuck out. When Damon got home from work yesterday afternoon, he saw Dixon in the neighbor's front yard. I told him (he was on the phone with me at the time) to go get the cat. Damon said he tried, but Dixon hissed at him & ran off. Damon said that he was like, "Forget it" & was going to let me get the cat when I got home. See, I can go and just say his name a few times & he comes running to me. (...he's so sweet...and such a mama's boy!) Well, I tried that yesterday, & I didnt ever find him. I tried it later in the evening, then just before I went to bed, then again this morning. I never found him! I am so pissed. I told Damon this morning that he needed to get up out of bed & find my cat before he went to work. That was around 7:15. Damon didnt leave the house to go to work until 9:30, but he never found the cat. (I'm not entirely convinced that he even tried.) So--I wont be able to try again until tonight.

Frustrating. And, I just am so afraid that someone would try to steal him because he's so pretty...or that some punk kids would be mean to him. This sucks.

Okay..I've got to get some work done.

Monday, January 03, 2005

Monday, Monday....go away, come again another day!

So, it's Monday. I hate Mondays.

Here's what is going on, and I'm a bit pissy about it.

I share an office with Jamie. Love it. She loves it. It's great.

Her boss is Amy. Well, Jamie has been out sick. So--Amy was doing Jamie's job. Well, Amy got onto an employee while I was sitting here at my desk. That employee got upset because I was present for the talk. Well, I can understand that. So--now Amy is saying that this whole "sharing an office" thing is not working out b/c privacy needs to be kept if Jamie is going to have to talk to employees. Well, jamie & I made it work. Jamie & I had no problem working it out. Amy is the one who came in here & talked to an employee & compromised the privacy. Now, she's the one who's deciding that Jamie is switching to another office.

I am not excited. I am going to now share an office with Kathy. She's a nurse who does recall stuff. Fine. I like Kathy. She's very nice. But--here's what is so crappy about all of it. (1) Kathy does not know that she is about to share an office after having her own office for years. (2) Kathy is going to have to move alllll of her stuff. (3) There is not enough space in here for Kathy to bring allllll of her stuff. (4) Kathy is on vacation now--so they are going to tell her when she gets back. (5) Kathy is also in for a big surprise when she finds out that she is going to be doing administrative work for 3 days/week, and now she's going to be doing patient care for 2 days/week. She is used to having her office & doing administrative work for 5 days/week. I just feel so bad for her. She's so nice. She's on vacation & she is coming back to this crap. Lucky girl! *note the sarcasm*


I started reading my book last night. It's okay. The first chapter was a bit...long...but now Girl has met a guy, so hopefully the book will start to pick up.

I dont know much else right now. I gotta run see a patient.

Sunday, January 02, 2005

Funday Sunday.....not.

It's Sunday & I'm at stupid work.

I am working today b/c I will be off on Wednesday for my deposition. This way I get to save some of my PTO.

Damon goes back to work tomorrow after being off for one week. I know he is not excited about that.

Movie Reviews:
"Face Off"...older movie. We'd seen it before, but we watched it again over the weekend. Great action movie.

"Dodgeball"...incredibly stupid, but has some quite comical moments.
That's it...

How was New Year's??? Went to a party @ Bobby & Penny's house. Monty & Erin were there. So where quite a few other people. We had a great time. We were back home & in bed by 2:30... asleep by 3.

Yesterday's weather was unbelievable! I was wearing shorts & flip flops! It was awesome. I finally spent some time on that new swing of mine. I loved it.

I think the dog has a urinary tract infection. I wont get into all of the messy details--but I think he does. We've got him on medicine now, so that should be resolving itself shortly. (I hope!)

Damon's cooking in the crock pot today. He's so impressed that you can put all the ingredients in there, and slow cook something for 6-10 hours. woo-hoo! This, from the man who can cook practically anything. I cant believe he's never really used the crockpot before. What a freak!!

Okay...it's getting kind of busy now, so I gotta run. All this, and at the end of my day! Yuck!