Baby Gage...

Well, we had a rough night last night.

Contractions were 5 minutes apart for 40 minutes...then spaced out further...then disappeared.

Gage's horoscope for today (provided he's born before 9/22, he'll be a Virgo):
Quickie:
You're not making much progress, but resist the urge to give up. You're no quitter.

So, I guess that's fitting of last night's behavior....


Then, other than that, I woke up & had a crying spell that started around 4. It started w/ thinking of Riley, and going to the visitation tonight...and then, as a typical woman, I was crying about every little thing that was/is wrong--ever. Poor Damon doesnt know what to do--he seems to think that when I cry, everything will just be better if I'll stop crying. I happen to believe that crying is amazingly cathartic, and I generally feel better afterwards...but it's like I just have to get it all out, you know? So, I felt bad when I woke him up crying...he didnt know what to do...so I just went to the nursery & rocked Gage & myself...which made me cry more because I have this pillow that sits in the rocker...it reads, "A mother holds her child's hand for a little while, but their heart forever"...and immediately I was thinking about my sister & Riley again, which seemed to start the whole thing over again.

So, I took a bath...read a little...and got back in bed around 5:30, although by then, I wasnt the least bit sleepy. All I wanted was for Damon to hold me...but I didnt want to wake him up again.

Today & tomorrow are just going to be really hard.
I've got to find some shoes to wear.