Life Is Just So Daily

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Baby Gage...

Well, we had a rough night last night.

Contractions were 5 minutes apart for 40 minutes...then spaced out further...then disappeared.

Gage's horoscope for today (provided he's born before 9/22, he'll be a Virgo):
You're not making much progress, but resist the urge to give up. You're no quitter.

So, I guess that's fitting of last night's behavior....

Then, other than that, I woke up & had a crying spell that started around 4. It started w/ thinking of Riley, and going to the visitation tonight...and then, as a typical woman, I was crying about every little thing that was/is wrong--ever. Poor Damon doesnt know what to do--he seems to think that when I cry, everything will just be better if I'll stop crying. I happen to believe that crying is amazingly cathartic, and I generally feel better afterwards...but it's like I just have to get it all out, you know? So, I felt bad when I woke him up crying...he didnt know what to I just went to the nursery & rocked Gage & myself...which made me cry more because I have this pillow that sits in the reads, "A mother holds her child's hand for a little while, but their heart forever"...and immediately I was thinking about my sister & Riley again, which seemed to start the whole thing over again.

So, I took a a little...and got back in bed around 5:30, although by then, I wasnt the least bit sleepy. All I wanted was for Damon to hold me...but I didnt want to wake him up again.

Today & tomorrow are just going to be really hard.
I've got to find some shoes to wear.



At 8:51 PM , Blogger CBM said...

I am praying for you and your family. I lost my grandmother (whom I was very close to) during late pregnancy, so I can relate somewhat to your situation. As if your hormones weren't hard enough to deal this horrible tragedy too? It seems like too much to bear, but you will get through it. Hang in there. Very soon you will have a joyous blessing in your arms!

May you have a wonderful birth experience!

Carole (Ginger's friend)


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