Life Is Just So Daily

Monday, January 18, 2010

New Year's Newsletter....

Christmas cards?
Not this year.
In fact, since Gage was born in 2005, I think we've only sent out Christmas cards once. The rest have been New Year's Cards.
One might say we don't ever have our ducks in a row by Christmas.
Or...maybe we're just trendsetters. {don't YOU want to send out New Year's cards!?}

Anyway....this year, in addition to the New Year's card...I'm sending out a family newsletter.
It's....kind of a spoof on the family newsletters that you get from the "Perfects." Oh, come on----we all know the Perfects! The perfect mom with the perfect hair, the perfect home, the perfect husband, the perfect children with perfect grades, etc.

So, here's our very IMPERFECT family newsletter.
Ideas were snipped from various places, and just kind of thrown together, so that 2010 can go down as the year that Laine sent out a family newsletter FULL OF LIES!
{now gotta love that!}

Well, well, well. Here we are again. It’s apparently time for the "Casa-de Lainey-Paney" family newsletter. Can you believe that 2010 is already here? 2009 started with January, just like the year before. And before we knew it, February came along, and then March. Our uber-intelligent, gifted and talented, genius child soon recognized the pattern, and was able to confidently predict April and May. After that, the monthly predictions were barely even a challenge. Gage soon hypothesized that Christmas would fall in December this year. Sure enough, here I am, sitting here, writing to you. Christmas came in December. A genius, I tell you. There’s just really no capping his intellect, now is there?

We don’t have the 2.1 kids to BRAG about in our newsletter, and for that we apologize. I’ll try to double the bragging about our son to accommodate your needs, mmmkay?

Gage is now 4, and he’s practically embarrassed himself with accomplishments. He started PreK-3s this year, based on his age. After years of teaching Michael Phelps to swim, climbing Mount Everest, and mastering 8 different languages, it was time for Gage to spend some time with kids his own age. We proudly report that he’s doing well in Pre-K, and actually teaching his teachers about relaxation through guided imagery. His goal for 2010 is to cure world hunger, and he’s almost mastered the formula for doing so. Again, I tell you---there’s just no capping his intellect.
In addition to amazing intellect, this child excels at everything sports related. His athletic ability is unsurpassed. As mentioned, he taught Michael Phelps to swim, and taught Tiger everything he knows about golf {golf, and only golf. Any of Tiger’s mistakes shall not serve as a reflection in any way on our son, his golf skills, or teaching abilities}. This past year Gage wanted to test the limits of his wee-body by being the first and only 4 year old to tackle Everest. We are happy to report that we made it a family event, and all reached the Summit without supplemental oxygen, in less than 2 days. Our heroic son even carried the Sherpa back down to the base-camp on a make-shift sled that he constructed out of his own coat, his backpack, and branches. The Boy Scouts of America celebrated his actions with an honorary Eagle Scout pin.

And just when we thought we couldn’t be any more proud, our son finished composing his third opera, and vowed to live at home with us forever, because we’re just so much fun.

No, Really….None of that stuff is true, except: Gage did start Pre-K, it is going well, we ARE proud of him, and he has promised to live at home with us forever! Life is just as crazy as usual. {hence the New Year’s card instead of a Christmas card! Short on time, anyone?} Around here, we’re all lucky if we know what day it is, are dressed appropriately for the weather & occasion, and make it ANYWHERE on time (okay….so that’s not true for ALL of the members of this family, but it’s always true if MOMMY is responsible for getting anyone anywhere!). Despite our imperfections, we are thankful for our blessings, and thankful for each other. We are thankful that we can retain a sense of humor with our hectic life and imperfect family. We are especially thankful for the gift of Jesus, a gift freely given and undeserved.

We hope you have a happy and blessed 2010!

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At 2:53 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are so funny!

At 7:10 PM , Blogger Kate said...

Fantastic newsletter! Happy new year, Lainey and fam!

At 10:21 AM , Blogger Lisa said...

OMG! I love that idea!!!!!!

At 11:46 AM , Blogger Pregnantly Plump said...

I like it! Did you photoshop a picture of Gage carrying the sherpa down the mountain for the card?

At 2:22 PM , Blogger Lainey-Paney said...

No, but next year's newsletter will be even more dramatic. I thought about photoshopping ourselves into a bunch of different places...but decided to do that for next year!

who wants to give me a crash course in photoshop? ....oh, and buy photoshop for me?


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