You Know I'm From The City When....
WARNING: I never promised to be PC. I never promised to be smart either. I never promised to be anything but me.
So....over the weekend, we went to Camp Wanica. It's a big campground place that my family rents out at least twice a year for gatherings. In total, my Aunt Loraine says there are about 94 of us now.
Anywhooooooo.....
Getting out of the city, out into the country....well, it magnifies the city girl in me. I have three scenarios (true stories...and boy, am I proud) that took place while there...
ONE:
We're in the car, cruising on down the white gravel road to turn off to Camp Wanica.
Gage: "Mommy, what are those?"
Me: "Those are cows."
Gage: "What do you call them?"
Me: "Cows."
So, we took pictures of the cows.
Two things to note about this: my child didn't recognize a cow when he saw one. He's only seen them in kiddie-books, and then they are drawings or cartoonish, and---there's the city girl: Out there taking pictures of cows!
TWO:
Some of my cousins were sitting around talking about how some of my other cousins went hog hunting last night. My brain immediately thinks they went bar hopping cruising for fat chicks. Um, no. Apparently that was not the case. They (the guys)pulled out a cooler, opened it up....clear ice on there. No biggie...could have been cokes buried in the ice. One of them grabbed the handle, tipped the cooler sideways, and started draining out the bloody water at the bottom of the cooler.
Me: "Oh, God, Did you kill her??????"
I wanted NO PART of that! I'm no accessory after the fact! No, um....turns out, they really went out hunting hogs. These are pigs that just live in the wild [wherever the hell that is!]. So, I thought that maybe they were like some kind of runaway pig that escaped from a farm somewhere (we've all read Animal Farm, right?)... No, there are just pigs that are born in the brush somewhere & they procreate & it's this whole thing of wild pigs that just....run around, procreate, and get hunted by my cousins. Hmmmmm....who knew? Not this city girl.
THREE:
Me: "Look at that bird-thing."
Cousin: "It's not a 'bird-thing.' It's a bird."
Me: "Well, I called it that because it looks like a bird, but it's running so fast!"
Cousin: "It's a Road-Runner."
Me: "No....those things are supposed to be like 5 feet tall, right? Remember that cartoon with the coyote & the road-runner? That thing was as big as a coyote."
Cousin: "Yeah...it was also a cartoon."
In my mind....a Road-Runner was more like an Ostrich. In reality...it's quick, it's small, it's cute, but it can keep itself away from me, thank you very much.
All in all, we had a WONDERFUL time....even if I don't know a DAMN thing about non-city-life!
I'll post pics soon!
Labels: camp wanica, Family
17 Comments:
Well, I will admit I thought a roadrunner was big too...And I was brought up on a gravel road in the back woods of Mississippi.
I was dreadfully dissapointed when I found out Road runners were not like in the cartoons too! You really ARE a city girl arn't you! too funny mate.
All I have to say is....HA HA HA!!! I am laughing so freakin hard! You are so funny!
ROFL that made for a very entertaining post. Sounds like you'll be glad to retreat to city life again :)
I think you're version of hog hunting sounds far more entertaining!
I can totally relate to both sides!
Side note: Have you seen preview for the new movie Baby Mama? Last Sat. during Saturday Night Live, there was a long preview that had Maura Tierney smelling her childs brown covered hands to see if it was chocolate or poo. Then she licked it!, and said it’s chocolate. I laughted really hard because of your shituffins post!
BWAHAHAHA! I thought the same thing about roadrunners! And I'm MUCH OLDER than you and probably should have known better. BWAHAHA!
And your hog-hunting relatives remind me of the times I would go with my grandparents to visit the relatives "at the farm." They frightened me. That's probably why I haven't seen them since I was a kid :).
So, I am totally with you on loving being FROM THE CITY...and loving your blog. I find it necessary to now warn you that I will regularly be stalking. I know I've commented before a few times, a long time ago and then I don't know what happened. But yesterday, while procrastinating on the things I should have been doing, I "rediscovered" you, and went back to when Gage was born. And now I am SERIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY hooked. But don't be alarmed; I'm basically harmless. Just wordy, and I comment a lot! :)
I'm so glad you made it back to the city safely...ya gotta keep your eye on those cows! And Gage? Oh my gosh, he is so stinkin' cute, and growing up so fast! Just sayin'...
We LIVE in the city, but there is a very small farm at the end of our street complete with sheep and sometimes goats. It completely freaks me out to see it just feet from a major road. I think I like my city WITHOUT a taste of country!
Too funny!
That's awesome that your whole family gets together like that!
Wild hogs taste nasty - just so you know. Even the bacon isn't great.
We have a roadrunner that lives in our flower bed - in a SUBDIVISION - in the CITY LIMITS. Of course, it is the hill country...
You make my laugh. That 3rd scenario reminds me of school so much. I must say 10 times a week, "Movies, cartoons, and T.V. are not necessarily real. In fact, unless you are watching a documentary it probably isn't real." Lots of those "science-y" movies are fake science that sounds real. :) But the hog hunting....that is crazy funny!
You're a city girl with a great sense of humor!
(Hog hunting and slaughtering? Yuck.)
haha! to be fair, though, I saw a road runner in Arizona and was so totally surprised at how small it was!
lol.. that is HILARIOUS!! I love it!
Ok totally with you on the road runner! He should look like the damn cartoon! I grew up in a small town but I get all excited by critters and you would never know that I grew up all around these things. I'm a total tourist when we go anywhere because I never travled when I was little so I too stopped to take a picture of the cows crossing the road on our way home from Wyoming and took a picture of a roadrunner when we were in Arizona!
When I saw your road runner pic I'm thinking "no way they are taller!" don't feel bad fellow city girl!
This just cracks me up. Ever since I heard your voice I read all your posts in a southern accent and it makes me laugh even harder. What a great post, and the one above this post your family is so cute, Mema with her great great grandbabies she looks to young to have great great grandbabies.
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