LMAO!

Okay....so, working on bringing this vision of my grand master bath to light...
Looking for a toilet.
Wasn't really impressed when the selection at Home Depot.
Did find it humorous that they are all UP on a shelf at an angle for display.

"Um, yes, Mr.Home Depot Man...can you get me one of those. I just need to sit on one to make sure it feels right."
I guess that's why they are UP there. Otherwise...people would be sitting on them all the time, and the random prankster would inevitably sh*t in one.

Moving on...
So, I'm looking online for toilets.
Looking for something that is a 1 piece model b/c I saw one once on HGTV, and quite honestly I have no idea why that would be better than a 2 piece model...so I thought I'd check it out.

With regard to 1 piece toilets: remember that toilet in my parents house. How you push in to flush & how low to the ground it was. I'm short. I loved that toilet.
(there's a bit of randomness from my past.......)

Anyway...so I'm looking online for toilets.
Here's what I found:

Um. It's way expensive.
So, if $$$$$ is no object, but space is, then this little contraption is for you.
You can brush your teeth while your partner takes a poo.
And seriously...if $$$ is really not an option---buy some space.
This is like recreating the ambiance of an airplane bathroom.
Thanks, but I'll pass.
This piece cost $5,887.00
(which, I guess really is cheaper than a complete bathroom renovation....)

AAAAND...just in case there is someone in your home who is worthy of a throne...
"A throne of their own" if you will....
Well, for the bargain price of about $12,000.00, this toilet could be yours!

(This product will be installed by the official knights of the round table).
(Castle Not Included)

And alas, the modern, toilet-seat-sold-separately wall mounted toilet & bidet combo.
For my mother's safety & sanity, we will not be installing a bidet. (Inside joke...most readers will not get that....but she will.)

I'd be so afraid that 1) Most people would not FIT on that teeny-weeny-toity, and 2) it would somehow dismount from the wall & I'd bust my hiney wide open on ceramic slivers as the toilet & I went crashing to the floor.
me:"Um...yes, I'd like to check into the emergency room b/c I've got potty in my ass."
RN: "You put pot in your ass?"
me: "Um...no, my toilet broke & it's in my ass."
That's a future conversation I'd rather not have.

My advice: steer clear of designerplumbing.com
(and really, I've brought you the highlights...so it's hardly worth checking out now anyway...)