IVF: Wish us luck.

We have our IVF Orientation today. Wish us luck.

We've come to the conclusion {you know, after being told} that IVF is our best option. After Hubby's prostate surgeries and my newly dx'd blocked tubes {F.U. Endometriosis!}, it looks like those 3 IUIs never would have worked in the first place.
{There's money, time, and excitement that we can't get back.}

I've been soooooo excited and literally counting down the days until egg retrieval.
And then---suddenly, it's like I get freaked out in an instant.
The shots.
The cost.
Pregnancy after miscarriage.
What if it doesn't work?
What if it does and it's 4 babies!?
What if it hurts?
What if I get that hyperstimulation that seems so horrible?
I can't keep calling them babies.
They are blastocysts.
Cells.
What if it doesn't work?

Who do we tell?
I'm excited! Let's tell everybody!
What was I thinking? Why did I tell people? What if it doesn't work?

I'm not yet even hopped up on mega-hormones, and I'm already neurotic and completely crazy and sometimes hoping for twins {Hubby don't read that last part, which I actually read is completely normal for people who've been through infertility b/c they put so much thought, time, and energy into trying to get pregnant, and initially they think that twins are an efficient way to procreate}.

Yeah, I might be just a little bit crazy.
Can't wait to see what this shit's like when I'm REALLY hopped up on hormones.
{World: Consider yourself warned.}